I used to think, that finding a partner was as easy as following your bliss, as a consequence I met an extraordinary bunch of women and learned that I needed to be more strategic in my search. As I began to reconsider my approach to finding a man, I noticed that many of the women around me were asking the same question: where are all the best men hiding? Finding a guy is not about location because you can meet amazing people everywhere; it’s a matter of disconnecting from your iPhone and engaging with the people around you. To abet my search in finding a life partner, I created an A to Z, an exhaustive list of places, I could go to meet the best men. Not every man you meet will be a perfect fit, nevertheless dating is a numbers game; Even if you do not find your dream man at one of these locations, flirting is fun and each encounter is an opportunity to fine-tune your social and dating skills.
‘To meet more men, you have to, er, meet more men!’ – Matthew Hussey
I composed my first A to Z list in the summer of 2011, a couple of months after my arrival in London; not only did this list help me land dates and a few romances but I also made some amazing friends along the way. I didn’t always meet a great guy the first time I went to a place on my list and I soon realised, I needed to be consistent and keep going back. I have included my favourite 10 places, that were on my original list, to aid your search for Mr Right or even Mr Right Now if that’s your thing.
Have fun, get creative and fill in the blanks. Before, compiling your list contemplate, the type of man you would like to meet and consider the places he would be over the weekends. Ask yourself, what qualities and values would my ideal partner exude? Write this list of qualities down. In consideration of your ideal partners values, ask yourself where would this person spend their time? Knowing what you want is instrumental to knowing where to search. As you create your list of places to meet your ideal man, continue to reconcile your list of qualities against the potential places and double check, that your lists do not contradict each other. Assembling a list of locations without giving thought to the type of person you are after, is futile and may not give you the results you desire. This activity, not only helps you narrow your search, but allows your list to be strategic and is more likely to result in finding a partner.
A – Art Gallery
Art Galleries and Museums are the best places to meet people because most people have their guard down and are not expecting to meet someone like they would in a bar. Take your time to amble around the gallery and soak in the beauty of the, ahem, artwork! When you find someone who heightens your curiosity, strike up a conversation and ask them their opinion on a piece, or what is their favourite painting in the collection. I once met a man at the National portrait gallery in London, we discussed the portraits and the detail of the brush strokes, then spent the afternoon wandering around and chatting, followed by tea at a nearby café.
B – Bookshops
If you value intellect, then a book shop or library is the best place for you. It’s the perfect place to practice your enticing smile or seductive eyes and grab his attention quietly. I met a guy in a bookshop called Foyles in London, in the language department while browsing for a Spanish language tutorial set; He was looking for an advanced language course for Latin American Spanish. He taught me a few Spanish words and we had a quite giggle at my pronunciation attempts, then had a coffee together in the café later that day; we kept in touch and he invited me to a party where I met another guy whom, I dated for three months.
C – Camera shops
Camera shops or any gadget shop are an excellent place to meet men. Men love gadgets and love to talk about them as well as giving their expert opinion. If you are a photography or gadget enthusiast, head down to your local gadget shop and check out all the ‘good-looking’ merchandise. Join a class, which provides ample opportunities to strike up conversations with your fellow gadget enthusiasts.
D – Dentist
Yes, you read that correctly, the dentist. I meet a rather terrified man in the waiting room of the dentist near my work. I was cheerfully and patiently waiting for my appointment. I asked him what type of procedure he was waiting for, we got talking and he suggested that we meet up, after we recover from our dental procedures.
F – Film festival
If you are a film enthusiast, then a film festival is the best place to go. Film Festivals are teeming with men and is the perfect place to engage in a conversation about the latest and upcoming films. Be sure to choose a genre that is man friendly. You’re not going to meet an available man in line to watch a romantic comedy. It’s all about the choice of film and engaging with the people around you.
G – Weight Room at the gym
According to many gyms, the majority of people pumping iron are men. If you prefer cardiovascular training, then try some classes that are seeing an increase in male participants. I attended a gym by Nuffield Health in London, I decided to give the weight room a whirl. I asked a nearby man on his opinion, on how much weight I should be using on the pectoral fly machine. He turned out to be a jazz musician and invited me along to his next gig at a jazz bar in London.
R – Rock Climbing
If you love the thrill that adventure brings or want to tackle your fear of heights and want someone who is equally like-minded, then rock climbing is the place for you. It is estimated that nearly two-thirds of wall climbers are male. The venues are an easy place to meet people because the atmosphere is extremely social and charged with excitement.
T – Tube
Yes, I’m one of those annoying people who will try to strike up a conversation with the people around me on public transport. If you live in a densely populated area like London, the tube contains a treasure trove of interesting men. If you see a man reading a book that you are interested in, asking him for his recommendation or if you see a guy with an iPhone or iPad ask him what his favourite App is; be warned some people are a little rude and will not answer you but the majority of people are usually friendly.
V – Volunteer Project
When we volunteer, we dedicate our time towards our passions and values. There is no better qualified to meet a potential partner than our values. Volunteering is an opportunity to meet like-minded individuals and is provides the perfect opportunity to strike up a conversation. I volunteered to be a part of the great gorilla run with a friend who later dropped out because he got deported, during the awards ceremony, I shared a few laughs with a couple of the runners and we later exchanged numbers.
W – Wimbledon
If you are in London during the summer, have a love of tennis as well as value health and fitness, then Wimbledon is the place for you. Watch your favourite tennis star in action, walk the grounds between matches; the grounds are crawling with people relaxing, watching the tennis on the big screens, everyone is there to have a good time and it’s an easy atmosphere to strike up a conversation with a random hottie.
After you have carefully composed your list, choose three places from your list that you would not normally visit and highlight them, and visit these places in the next month; I encourage you to decide right now and place your list somewhere that you will see every day, because if you’re anything like me, you will never do it if it’s not done immediately. Find a way to make yourself accountable for your actions, for instance, tell a friend who will ask you about your progress. If you have any venues or suggestions that you would like to share; please let me know by using the comments box below. I’d love to hear from you.
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